Fade Away
by Light1
Summary: Seras witnesses a tragedy and turns to Alucard for help.


**Fade Away**

Disclaimer: Hellsing belongs people who are not me. I am making £0.00 out of this fic, it is written purely because I have a burning need to create. Although I would like to own Alucard . . . then he'd be mine.

Rating: PG-13

Authoress note: I don't know why this happened. It just did. It is depressing.

 _Italics mean flashbacks or thoughts_

* \/ * /\ * \/ * /\ *

 **Fade Away**

"I wish I were like you."

Those six little words had made Seras drop her gun. She turned dumbfounded to face the young mercenary who had spoken.

"What did you say?" She asked, picking up her gun.

"I wish I were like you, well not a woman, I mean, but a vampire," he said blushing a little as she stared at him. She opened her mouth to speak but couldn't find the words and just gaped at him.

"What?" she managed again after a few moments.

"If I were like you then I'd be unstoppable," he said. "No need to worry about getting hurt or not being strong enough, I'd be young, beautiful and live forever." Seras shook her head.

"No it's not like ..." she started.

"Alright lads," the captain bellowed. "First team move." Glancing at the young mercenary she swallowed and charged forwards with the first team into the building.

The entrance was clear, but growls and cries from the hallways told her it wouldn't be for long. She was right, within moments one of the doors opened and ghouls shambled out into the entrance hall. They turned her stomach, not one of them was over the age of twenty-five. She took a slow deep breath and aimed her gun.

"Come on, you knew to expect this," she said. She fired twice and moved on; turning a corner she fired again and again and again. Each time a ghoul fell, a life ended. "They died already," she reminded herself. "No one chooses to be a ghoul," she grit her teeth. "Find the one who did this."

"Um... Miss Victoria?" it was the deluded mercenary from outside. "Are you alright, only your eyes have gone all ... I mean it looks really cool but..."

"Shut up," Seras snapped at him. "I'm fine, just angry. All this life, this potential." She stopped speaking unable to find the words again.

"Why so many ghouls? Why aren't they vampires?" the mercenary mumbled firing off two more shots and following Seras as she hunted for the vampire.

"It's a university dorm, what do you expect?" she snapped.

"Um..." he managed.

"You've got to be a virgin," she turned on her heel and growled at him, he blushed and looked down, Seras didn't notice his smile. "And blood has to be exchanged; a bite alone won't do it. Now shut up and focus." She led him and three others forward, taking down the ghouls where they stood. Each time one fell she reminded herself that it was not the student it had been, it was a mindless ghoul, she was not killing people she was ending the torment.

They found the vampire on the top floor, she was so very young. Seras felt a pang of guilt when she took aim. The vampire hissed at her and threw one of the ghouls at her. Seras rolled to the side; she hadn't been expecting the clumsy but effective attack and found herself wrestling with a ghoul for a few moments before managing to decapitate it.

"Come to me child," the vampire spoke softly. Seras got to her feet, ready to ask who the vampire thought she was calling a child. The vampire couldn't have been more than sixteen years old.

"I want..." the young mercenary said stepping forward. Seres was rooted to the floor as she watched him go to her, watched as the vampire girl wrapped arms around him.

"I will be like you," he said turning to Seras. "I won't be a ghoul, I will be like you." He spoke calmly, softly, slurring his words slightly. She watched frozen as his eyes glazed over when the vampire sunk fang into him. She couldn't stop it, couldn't fire her gun, couldn't even shout at him to stop, couldn't do anything.

She was startled out of her frozen state by her master's gun fire. It was louder than any handheld gun she ever remembered hearing. The mercenary and the vampire fell to the ground in a bloody mess.

"I can't wait to hear your excuse behind that little stunt," her master said turning to her.

"He ..." Seras managed blinking her eyes rapidly as tears filled them. She sniffed and took a slow breath. "Sorry, I let him distract me." she looked down expecting a verbal barrage of insults, but none came. She glanced up at her master after the moment of silence stretched uncomfortably. He was frowning at her, he lifted his gun hand over her head, gun still held firm and let the oversized firearm drop the few inches so the butt of the gun hit her gently on the head.

"Idiot," he muttered and turned away. She turned back to the remaining mercenaries they were mopping up the remaining ghouls. The little vampire had been busy; Seras shivered but set to work cleaning up anything that wasn't human. She fell into a rhythm after a while and stopped seeing dead students or even ghouls, they were just targets. But every few minutes her mind returned to the image of the young mercenary in the arms of the vampire, every time she heard him say that he wanted to be like her.

Eventually, when the worst of the shooting was done she made her way outside, let the men finish the ghouls off.

"You seem . . . upset." Alucard appeared behind her as she headed out. She glanced at him, not even remotely surprised at his sudden appearance. She had felt his eyes on her for the last ten minutes.

"Yes well," she said softly. "You know me."

"I know that you have seen enough of death that what happened in there should not have caused you to freeze like that," Alucard said keeping pace with her. Seras didn't say anything. "You knew him?"

"I, well, no. I didn't even know his name," she swallowed the lump in her throat. She saw the young mercenary again, the life fading from his eyes and the pure joy in his face as he died.

"And yet still you mourn him?" Alucard raised an eyebrow at her. Seras shook her head.

"I spoke to him on the way here," she said but fell quiet as they reached Integra. Integra nodded to the pair.

"All targets are destroyed?" she asked firmly, Alucard nodded.

"All primary targets are destroyed," he said. "Now all that remains is trash." Integra nodded and turned to one of the mercenaries' who stood next to her. "Send in the third team." She turned back to Alucard and Seras. "You may return back to the house with the men if you wish, Seres." Seras shook her head; she didn't want to return with the men, she didn't want to be near any of them.

"It's a nice night," Alucard said softly, head tilted upwards, eyes searching for the moon, hidden behind clouds.

"Yes, it is," Seres smiled a little, taking the invitation from her master to return with him. The pair turned away from Integra and headed in the direction of the house on foot. "We're not teleporting?" Seres asked when Alucard didn't stop at the perimeter the mercenaries' had set up. Alucard turned and smiled at her.

"It is a nice night, I thought we would walk," he said, Seres gestured to herself, her bloodstained uniform, and her battered harconnen.

Alucard smiled and walked to her, taking her weapon from her he threw it over his shoulder, it flew through the air, landing in a shadow he had created just for the purpose of sending the weapon back to the house where it would be repaired and cleaned. Absently he wrapped arms and darkness around his fledgeling for a few moments; when the darkness fell away Seres found herself wearing her casual clothing. In the back of her mind, she made a note to buy more clothes, she wore the same outfit so much that even Alucard knew what it looked like.

"I always wondered how you kept the same coat clean and in one piece," she mumbled, following her master as he headed down the empty street. "You're seriously walking all the way back to the house?"

"Yes," Alucard said. "What's the hurry? Did you have something else you wanted to do?"

"Well no," Seres said. "But that will take all night!"

"Plenty of time for you to explain why you froze in there and why you're moping now." Alucard slowed his pace to keep with his child. Seres sighed, for a moment she debated keeping her thoughts to herself but she knew if she did that Alucard would get bored and root around in her head for them. She did not want that, there were things in there she wanted to keep private for as long as she could.

"He died willingly," she said after a few quiet moments.

"Are you sure about that?" Alucard asked, absently inhaling deeply through his nose, scenting the city, the thousands of people who had passed through this street by day and those who dwelt in it by night.

"He said, on the ride over here, that he wanted to be one of us," Seres said, Alucard made a small noise of recognition.

"Ahh one of those ones was he," it was not a question. "You will have to learn police girl, that some, well most, humans are stupid."

"Stupid?" Seres snorted. "For wanting to be like us? You do not regret what you are." For a split second, Alucard looked away from her and she could have sworn he looked uncomfortable, but the expression was gone as fast as it had arrived and he wore his usual superior smirk.

"True," he said. "I do not regret what I am, but I was made for this life, as were you. We can survive it, the loss, the bitterness and the violence, not only do we survive it but we thrive on it." He smiled fiercely, but it faded quickly. "Some humans see us through rose-tinted glasses," he smirked at her, "and who can blame them when you're the example we set."

"What the hell does that mean?" Seres snapped.

"You are kind, sweet and for everyone to see you are still so very human." He reached out and tilted her chin back so she was looking directly at him. "But I know you. I know what lives in here," he tapped her rib cage where her heart was with his other hand.

"Whatever monster is in me you put it there," Seres said, knowing it wasn't true. All Alucard had done was giving the monster that was already inside her an outlet, an excuse. "Alright," she said when he snorted at her. "I take that back. But I can't help it that these people don't see what's really there. That all they see is a little girl who has to be rescued every ten minutes."

"I like rescuing you," Alucard muttered as if sulking. "Sometime's it's fun." Seras rolled her eyes at him and he chuckled. "In human fantasies, we are like them only better. We don't die, we don't age or suffer from pain or cold. We possess the wisdom of the ages."

"But that's not all," Seres whispered, Alucard continued as if she had not spoken

"And if we crave blood then it's nothing more grotesque than a man craving a hamburger."

Seres thought for a long moment on what Alucard had said. She had once held that view of vampires; when she had been young, with her nose stuck in teen horror books. All the vampires were beautiful and perfect. They were people who were snappy dressers, who never had any problems; they were sexy and sensual and always got what they wanted.

"But," Alucard's words snapped her out of her thoughts. "They are wrong. We are them with all their mistakes, their fears, their loneliness and their confusion. That does not change with the blood."

"Not a lot does change with the blood does it?" Seres asked looking up at her master. She felt a pang of guilt, he had been in such a good mood this evening and now she had dragged him down to her own depressing level. He looked pained as if having to admit that his little perfect world wasn't actually all that perfect after all.

"We are colder than them, dead I suppose," he smirked. "That changes." His sigh could have shaken buildings. "I miss food, the texture and the way it would taste. I miss the warmth I used to feel both my own and that of others." He looked at her directly. "I remember what it was like to feel pain and grief."

"But you just said you felt pain?" Seres said Alucard smirked at her.

"Don't be obtuse," he said. They walked in silence for a few moments before Seres grew uncomfortable.

"You miss food?" she said. She'd been in the kitchen with Alucard before when Walter was cooking and Alucard had been very vocal about his dislike of the smell. The ancient vampire smiled at her and nodded

"I used to like pheasant, especially roasted; the skin would go crispy and flavoured but the meat inside was soft." He smiled, remembering back hundreds of years to when he was young and living on snow-capped mountains. "The summers were rich and the table was always covered with a great many dishes. The whole castle would smell of life and food and warmth. In winter food was harder to come by but my table was never empty and the smells of roasted meat filled the castle. I miss that at times."

"But you complain about Walter..." Seras started.

"I'm only winding him up; you may have noticed there is a distinct lack of entertainment in the house," he smirked. "I still enjoy meat if it is rare, the taste, and the texture. My stomach isn't as fond of it as I am, but there's little I can do about that."

"I liked strawberries," Seres smiled. "Oh and hotdogs with loads of onions! My dad used to shout at me, saying I got more onion than meat."

"I haven't eaten since the French revolution, I ate steak," Alucard said.

"With onions?" Seres grinned, Alucard made a disgusted face. "Oh come on, you have to have onions with steak, really rare steak with loads of onions," she paused suddenly a very good scent touching her nose. She stopped and looked up; they had stopped in front of a burger bar.

She smiled widely at her master.

"Let's get a burger," she said. "With lots of onions."

"You'll regret it," he said.

"Don't care," Seras walked into the burger bar.

 **End Fic**

 **Authoress note** : Thank you for reading, please review, I'd love to hear what you think of the fic.

For information on published works and upcoming projects, release dates, as well as weekly blogs, check out katiemarie21 . wordpress . com

I wrote a Book. A big one and a couple of little ones. Check them out here  
katiemarie21 . wordpress shop /

My first Novel, Grey Wings has now been released!

GREY WINGS

Jason is stranded in a dark city and is in desperate need of help when he has no idea how he will get home.

So, when he collides with Aurelius, an Angel only in the mildest sense of the word – who has committed a crime worthy of great punishment, but has been handed a rare chance at redemption – Jason can see a way home.

However, their journey will be hampered by Fallen Angels, Earth Spirits, and Griffons – and none can say if everyone will make it home.


End file.
